Bringing down the TSA, one safety pin at a time
We made it home. The flight was blissfully uneventful and the girls were really good as gold. We did, however, have a small run in with the TSA in Washington DC, trying to get through security.
Getting through security with little kids is a lot of work. I find it to be the hardest part of flying alone with them actually. Everyone has to take off their shoes and jackets. I have to take my laptop and the two DVD players out of my bag and send them each through the x-ray machine separately. Then at the other end you have to repack, put everyone back together and you have to do it all without further aggravating the people in line behind you or making any snarky comments about shoe bombs. :) "Why can't you say bomb on an airplane? What if I was a bombardier?"
Yesterday, Brynn set off the metal detector. I come through after her and said to the TSA agent "she has a safety pin holding up her pants. I'm sure that's what set it off." I try to show him, but no, no he wants no part of it. "Ma'am she'll have to go through secondary screening."
Secondary screening is where the herd you into that glass hall, give you a run over with the metal detector, search your bags and search you. I've been selected for secondary screening once before (guess I had my scary terrorist face on that day) and it is a real pain. Going through secondary screening with kids?? That pain would increase exponentially. So I decided to make a very mild fuss.
Now I'm not normally one to mess with the TSA. I know what you are thinking right now - yes, mostly I mess with everyone, but I do have the ability to exercise good judgment. I don't have time to be hauled off and handcuffed to a bench somewhere in the netherworlds of the airport for making a bombardier joke.
Lisa: "She's three and it's just a safety pin."
A: "It's protocol ma'am. I don't want to separate you from your child ma'am, so if you would like to go with her you will have to go through secondary screening as well."
L: "But I have both of these little girls and like 12 bags with me." (Actually we had 4 bags, so a bit of hyperbole, but it was for a good cause.)
A: "You'll all have to go then ma'am."
L: "Really, over a safety pin? She's too little for these pants, so I had to pin them to keep them on her." (I know I'm pushing my luck now, but I figure what the heck.)
A: "Well...how about this? Can you take the safety pin off and you and the little girl will need to walk back through the metal detector. Oh, and you'll need to put the safety pin through the x-ray machine."
Wonderful! It's a totally senseless solution, but if it gets me out of secondary screening I'll do it. So we remove the pin. I put it on the conveyor belt to go through the x-ray machine. We passed through the metal detector and I thanked the agent for solving the problem. The girls and I head over to start putting our shoes back on and collecting our belongings.
But guess what we don't have? That's right - the safety pin and I need it because it is was it holding Brynn's pants up. So I quickly explained the situation to one of the agents and asked if she can find the pin for me.
"He made you put the pin through the x-ray machine?" She asks. "That's just so stupid."
"I know, but its fine. But I do need to find it, otherwise my daughter's pants are going to be around her ankles for the rest of the day."
So with a little insistence from me, they quite kindly stopped the machine and someone stuck his hand in there and finally found it. We re-pined Brynn's pants and were on our way. Whew - drama. But seriously what kind of terrorist activities could I have pulled off with the safety pin? I guess I could have poked the pilot in the eye. And what did they really expect to find when they x-ray'd the safety pin? Oh well, whatever, we didn't get secondary screened and we made it home.
Getting through security with little kids is a lot of work. I find it to be the hardest part of flying alone with them actually. Everyone has to take off their shoes and jackets. I have to take my laptop and the two DVD players out of my bag and send them each through the x-ray machine separately. Then at the other end you have to repack, put everyone back together and you have to do it all without further aggravating the people in line behind you or making any snarky comments about shoe bombs. :) "Why can't you say bomb on an airplane? What if I was a bombardier?"
Yesterday, Brynn set off the metal detector. I come through after her and said to the TSA agent "she has a safety pin holding up her pants. I'm sure that's what set it off." I try to show him, but no, no he wants no part of it. "Ma'am she'll have to go through secondary screening."
Secondary screening is where the herd you into that glass hall, give you a run over with the metal detector, search your bags and search you. I've been selected for secondary screening once before (guess I had my scary terrorist face on that day) and it is a real pain. Going through secondary screening with kids?? That pain would increase exponentially. So I decided to make a very mild fuss.
Now I'm not normally one to mess with the TSA. I know what you are thinking right now - yes, mostly I mess with everyone, but I do have the ability to exercise good judgment. I don't have time to be hauled off and handcuffed to a bench somewhere in the netherworlds of the airport for making a bombardier joke.
Lisa: "She's three and it's just a safety pin."
A: "It's protocol ma'am. I don't want to separate you from your child ma'am, so if you would like to go with her you will have to go through secondary screening as well."
L: "But I have both of these little girls and like 12 bags with me." (Actually we had 4 bags, so a bit of hyperbole, but it was for a good cause.)
A: "You'll all have to go then ma'am."
L: "Really, over a safety pin? She's too little for these pants, so I had to pin them to keep them on her." (I know I'm pushing my luck now, but I figure what the heck.)
A: "Well...how about this? Can you take the safety pin off and you and the little girl will need to walk back through the metal detector. Oh, and you'll need to put the safety pin through the x-ray machine."
Wonderful! It's a totally senseless solution, but if it gets me out of secondary screening I'll do it. So we remove the pin. I put it on the conveyor belt to go through the x-ray machine. We passed through the metal detector and I thanked the agent for solving the problem. The girls and I head over to start putting our shoes back on and collecting our belongings.
But guess what we don't have? That's right - the safety pin and I need it because it is was it holding Brynn's pants up. So I quickly explained the situation to one of the agents and asked if she can find the pin for me.
"He made you put the pin through the x-ray machine?" She asks. "That's just so stupid."
"I know, but its fine. But I do need to find it, otherwise my daughter's pants are going to be around her ankles for the rest of the day."
So with a little insistence from me, they quite kindly stopped the machine and someone stuck his hand in there and finally found it. We re-pined Brynn's pants and were on our way. Whew - drama. But seriously what kind of terrorist activities could I have pulled off with the safety pin? I guess I could have poked the pilot in the eye. And what did they really expect to find when they x-ray'd the safety pin? Oh well, whatever, we didn't get secondary screened and we made it home.
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