"Uno" I love you?
Sometimes I'm a really tired mommy. And the fatigue makes me cranky. And the cranky makes me kind of short tempered. And when I ask you to take your shoes off the kitchen table, you'll just do it without giving me lip. (If you know what's good for you. And what were your shoes doing ON the table in the first place??)
But sometimes I can pull it together. I remember that I'm a kind person. A patient and creative mother with an actual fondness for my children.
The other day I asked someone to help me tidy up the kitchen before dinner. And I got lip. Turning to face that whiny child, I was ready to snip and yell and then I got this flash. "Hold up, you are fun. Be fun."
Fun, I thought. Ok, I can do fun. So I said to whiny girl "I'll set the timer for 5 mins and if you can get all this done before it goes off, I'll give you a surprise."
"A surprise!?!" Whiny girl asks delighted. "Before dinner or after?"
"Before."
"Ok," she says. "I'll do it."
And she did. Without a word of whine. She did everything and a few other jobs I lumped in, because there was still time on the timer. And for a surprise I gave her a small bowl with about a dozen white chocolate chips and dozen chocolate chips. And she was thrilled. Crazy how happy 24 chocolate chips can make you.
After dinner whiny girl wanted to play a game of Uno. "Ok," we said, "one game. Then bed."
We invited sister, but she didn't want to play, so Chad and I got one on one time to play Uno with Miss Whine. Our one game turned into a tournament and we played and played. We tried really hard to beat her, but she's really good at Uno.
But every time she realized she was winning she would start drawing cards instead of playing them.
"What are you doing?" I asked. "You are winning? Don't you want to beat us?"
"I don't care. I just want to keep playing." She paused and looked at us with these kind, doe eyes we don't see much of right now. "I just love you guys."
And I smiled and said "Uno, I love you too?"
And we laughed and laughed.
And I remembered that being fun is a much better way to mother.
But sometimes I can pull it together. I remember that I'm a kind person. A patient and creative mother with an actual fondness for my children.
The other day I asked someone to help me tidy up the kitchen before dinner. And I got lip. Turning to face that whiny child, I was ready to snip and yell and then I got this flash. "Hold up, you are fun. Be fun."
Fun, I thought. Ok, I can do fun. So I said to whiny girl "I'll set the timer for 5 mins and if you can get all this done before it goes off, I'll give you a surprise."
"A surprise!?!" Whiny girl asks delighted. "Before dinner or after?"
"Before."
"Ok," she says. "I'll do it."
And she did. Without a word of whine. She did everything and a few other jobs I lumped in, because there was still time on the timer. And for a surprise I gave her a small bowl with about a dozen white chocolate chips and dozen chocolate chips. And she was thrilled. Crazy how happy 24 chocolate chips can make you.
After dinner whiny girl wanted to play a game of Uno. "Ok," we said, "one game. Then bed."
We invited sister, but she didn't want to play, so Chad and I got one on one time to play Uno with Miss Whine. Our one game turned into a tournament and we played and played. We tried really hard to beat her, but she's really good at Uno.
But every time she realized she was winning she would start drawing cards instead of playing them.
"What are you doing?" I asked. "You are winning? Don't you want to beat us?"
"I don't care. I just want to keep playing." She paused and looked at us with these kind, doe eyes we don't see much of right now. "I just love you guys."
And I smiled and said "Uno, I love you too?"
And we laughed and laughed.
And I remembered that being fun is a much better way to mother.
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